Sunday, 29 November 2009

Twenty Five Year Old Blonde Bomb-Shell

I started my work-shift and wandered out onto the shop floor when one of my work friends, we'll call him Mark, ( Who I had previously found it safe to assume was gay - for a multitude of reasons) comes over and says "Sam's looking for you".
"Who's Sam?" i ask, still not knowing a lot of people by name.
"One of the managers"
"What's he look like?"
"Twenty five year old blonde bomb-shell".
"I think i last saw 'em in the warehouse". He starts to walk away and i follow him. We go up to the lower-warehouse. "Over there". he points to an attractive mid twenties abecrombie looking guy, talking to two women. The women walk away and i go over to him.
"Mark sent me. You were looking for me?" He looks at me puzzled.
"Erm. No?"
"Oh. Sorry" i walk away back to find Mark.
"Did you find Sam?"
"Yeah, wasn't looking for me".
"What? I've just spoke to 'em. I'll give 'em a ring". He picked up the phone in the warehouse and punched in three digits. "i've got Calum with me. He just spoke to you... oh... okay... thanks Sam" he puts the phone down. "Still looking for you mate. Go back down to the shop-floor". So I do, where i find an old lady sprawled out at the end of one of the aisles. Boxes fallen on top of her. One of the managers grabs a box of biscuits from the shelf, tears them open and offers them to the woman with haste. "Calum. Get this woman a chair" she shouts to me. I find a chair around the corner and rush it over. "Have you seen Sam?" i ask giving her the chair.
"I'm Sam".
"No, no" i reply. "He's a blonde lad. Mark described him as a twenty five year old blonde bomb-shell".
"Oh did he now?" she smirks. "I'm the only Sam that works here." I look down at her badge. 'Samantha'. I look at her hair - blonde, I guess her age - twenty five. Uh oh. She shouts Mark over, and embarasses the both of us.
"Oops" i say afterwards. Mark doesn't look amused. That'll teach me to make assumptions.
Time to tune up my gay-dar.

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