Thursday, 26 November 2009

Like Happy Little Soldiers

I was happily at work, tidying up the food and alcohol gift section when my manager asked me to go work in the hair product section. I knew that was where the arseholes worked. I went over though like she asked; as its my job, and began tidying up various hair products. Satisfied with the row i had done i went to collect some more stock from upstairs. On my return i hear the manager shouting at another employee for standing around talking all day. "Now go tidy up that Elvive section. It's a shambles" i hear her shout. I look at the Elvive section i had just tidied seconds before, it looked fine to me. The boy she shouted at carried on talking to his friend so i went about perfecting the section. The manager walks around a few minutes later while im working on another shelf. "Calum could you just tidy up the Elvive for me?" she asked nicely. "Yeah sure". i reply politely, trying to hide the confusement that must have already been splayed across my face. "Like happy little soldiers" she says twisting some bottles on the end of the row and walking away. "Right". I twist all the bottles, facing forwards. Each one's label facing precicsely to the front. At exactly the right angle. I'm pleased with my work and again move across to another shelf. The manager comes back again a few minutes later. Now she starts to get snappy. "Calum! I told you to tidy up that Elvive section!". I look at it with confusement.
"Sorry" i reply, as i don't know what else to say. "I'll do it now".
"I'll be back in five minutes and it better be done" she scowls at me. I go back to the Elvive section and start picking up the bottles of shampoo, trying to arrange them in an impossible picturesque manner. I dust the shelves with my shirt sleeve and hide any of the unsightly bottles at the back; the ones that had been tested, and the ones that were covered in dust. She comes back again. She still isn't happy. "Are you purposefully ignoring me?!" i hear her whisper bitterly over my shoulder. I turn around to face her, bewildered at her comments, still holding two bottles of Elvive. "Now go do the Elvive section!".
"But I am" i say in forfeit, holding up the two bottles.
"Oh! Not Elvive. I meant Head&Shoulders. Silly me!". She points to the other side of the aisle. Where the Head&Shoulders products are all over the floor. "Sorry" she says with a smile and dithers off to confuse more employees.

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